I am still having vertigo but I'm pretending not to. It feels basically like I'm drunk, but with none of the positive feelings, just the room spinning and me feeling like I can't stay upright without swaying. My middle schoolers didn't notice at all, but the high school kids picked up on it pretty quickly, … Continue reading December 14: still dizzy, but ignoring it
December 13: so dizzy
I fell asleep at about 4:30 and only got up to eat at about 6:30, then come back to bed. I'm super-dizzy for some reason; I can barely stand up. I just woke up now at 2 am and realized I hadn't written, so I wanted to make sure I got on and got a … Continue reading December 13: so dizzy
December 12: not giving up
Everything in me wants to give up on things right now. Maybe it's the string of cloudy, gloomy days, or maybe it's the short days, or maybe it's that resources are tight while needs are high, but I'm way off my game. I'm forgetting things more than usual, I'm hyperfocused on things that aren't helpful … Continue reading December 12: not giving up
December 11: brain overload
My brain has been rushing a lot lately - like, my thoughts are flying through my mind at such a fast speed that I can't really keep up with them. They are pretty random lately, too. More random than normal. For example, if I've done anything awkward or embarrassing or "wrong" to any of you, … Continue reading December 11: brain overload
December 10: dramatic readings by 9 year olds
My daughter is reading her picture books to me as dramatically as possible. Right now, she is reading Pig the Pug books to me with more energy than seems possible. I wish I had that kind of energy ever, let alone at 9:45 at night. She has great potential as a speech team member in … Continue reading December 10: dramatic readings by 9 year olds
December 9: being a mom
I don't have the time or energy to really get into all the things I'm thinking about, but today was my oldest kid's 14th birthday, so I've been thinking about being a mom and all that goes into that. A lot of being a mom is kind of forced onto us by society. I try … Continue reading December 9: being a mom
December 8: exhausted
The sun hasn't been out in ages and it seems to be getting to me. Tonight I laid down and promptly began to sleep... and dream about weird things: I dreamt I was pregnant again, I dreamt I was stuck in space (that was no doubt thanks to the new Avengers trailer). All of this … Continue reading December 8: exhausted
December 7: Hmong New Year and Birthday Overnights
Annika was in Hmong Cland this fall and winter, so she performed in a fashion show tonight at her school's Hmong New Year's celebration. We focused on throwing out all the bad things from the last year and opening our hearts and minds to positive new changes. Then we had a delicious meal with the … Continue reading December 7: Hmong New Year and Birthday Overnights
December 6: Taking meds
I take medication for depression and ADHD. These two conditions are comorbid in a lot of people, even though there hasn't been causation shown either way (as far as I know). I have been had depression for as long as I can remember, but it got really bad after I was pregnant the first time … Continue reading December 6: Taking meds
December 5: staring at a blank page
It's hard to write every day and try not to be repetitive. Sometimes, nothing new comes up. Sometimes I am just generally content and things are going pretty well for the most part and I just don't have much going on in my mind. I mean, don't get me wrong, there's stuff going on up … Continue reading December 5: staring at a blank page
Adventures in Distraction 