When I left school today, it was dark. Not dim, not dusk. Dark. I used to love fall back because I love to sleep, but now, I’m annoyed with the entire concept of time in general and I just want to hibernate. Instead I’m going to take vitamin D pills whenever I remember them and try to eat citrus.

I’m feeling darker too. I’m never caught up with my grading no matter what. I always have things left undone. I want to hide from the world sometimes but that just makes it all worse because when I re-emerge, I have all the work still there but less time. So I just keep moving along, like a hamster trapped on a wheel.

I keep telling myself things will be better next trimester because I will have one less class to prep for and that many fewer students to try to work with. There are only 16 class days left in this trimester. That’s both good (because the end is in sight) but bad (because I have way too much to do in that time).

Still, one thing I’ve learned is that time is going to pass regardless and when the trimester is over, it’s over. I’ll do my best with the resources I have, then move on, knowing that if I had more time and fewer students, I would be more effective. I’m working my tail off. I wish I felt like it was enough.