So my face does not express what I want it to express. It is always extreme, it seems, and it feels like the older I get, the worse it gets. I can’t seem to make it show the right amount of emotion or even the right emotion. It’s just really weird.

I know this because I am getting nonverbal feedback, but I’m not really sure how to fix it. I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately, though. What I’m feeling inside doesn’t seem to translate quite right to others. It’s hard to explain and it’s really frustrating.

I can use my expressive face for good – I can engage kids with stories and humor – but I guess I have “resting bitch face.” The truth is, this bitch face NEVER rests. It looks disdainful when I actually feel puzzled. It looks like annoyance when I am daydreaming or thinking about something. It looks angry when I’m just working out a problem in my head. I just can’t count on it to accurately portray what’s going on inside.

I’m not sure what to do about it. If I try to be less expressive, people say I’m cold or stone-like. Or too serious. Or intense. Or intimidating. I don’t know. Maybe I need a face coach or something. That’s kind of hilarious.

Here’s my face with a wiener-man.