I’ve been to meetings and I’ve talked with so many different people about the problems with debate and I think I want to put some things “on paper” so to speak, just to get them out of my head. This will be specific to how to be a good adult at a debate tournament/as a debate coach or judge.

It’s preliminary and I’m sure I won’t be especially artful in my wording. Please excuse any faux pas – but let me know about them!

Here we go: Rules for Adults in Debate

1. Remember that debate is supposed to be educational and fun, not just competitive. Yep, it’s a competition, but it’s not a competition for who is the best person or who can beat the other team harder and more ruthlessly. Learning new things leads to competitive success; our role is to aid that learning.

2. As such, wins and losses should be handled gracefully. The kids are the competitors, not us adults. Coaches should not obsess over win/loss records during typical tournaments; it sets the wrong tone.

3. Do not denigrate other forms of debate. I have been guilty of this, and I’m working on it. We can call out practices that are harmful, but we need to come together. You know the stereotypes. We need to put those to bed.

4. We are not allowed to yell or scream – not at each other, not at judges, not at the tournament staff, and especially not at students. Handle yourself professionally, or handle yourself to the door.

5. Lunch breaks are a necessity – it’s not just nourishment, but it’s a chance for kids to hang out and meet each other and for judges and coaches to relax for a minute. Breaks between rounds are important too, especially for flighted tournaments where there is no downtime for judges.

6. Do not worry about how a kid is dressed in debate unless the dress is dangerous. Maybe they couldn’t afford a suit, maybe they just don’t own dress clothes. My kids don’t. Super important: Don’t tell girls to wear skirts, or not to wear skirts, or whatever. Yeah, clothing helps ethos and our dress might affect how people see us, but we are in the business of teaching other skills, not shaming kids for what we think is “appropriate.” They have the rest of their lives to wear uncomfortable dress clothes; let kids be kids.

7. Be gentle with kids, but let them know when they’ve done something that may be considered racist, ableist, sexist, homophobic, transphobic, classist, or generally offensive. Don’t assume they know what they’ve done.

8. Put your own political persuasions aside as best you can; debaters don’t get to choose which side they are on in any given round.

9. However, if a team or debater makes an argument that is problematic, racist, sexist, or otherwise offensive, they should not win the round.

10. Write on the ballot. Oral critiques are fine too, but please write down your impression of the debate so that your ideas can be conveyed to the coach. It is better for me as a coach to read your own writing than to try to get the oral critique from a debater who very likely isn’t remembering it exactly as it was said.

11. Be kind. Debate is intense. We don’t need to make it worse. Say hi to each other, invite new coaches and judges in to conversations. Debate is an insular community. It sucks to hang out in a place all day that feels judgmental and exclusive. So let’s not make it feel that way.

12. Lift up new coaches and people in the community, especially those who have been traditionally marginalized. Listen to their ideas, ask them about their experiences, and amplify their voices.

Old folks in the community (I guess I’m kind of one of them now): we need to do better. We have little to no communication; we have deep divisions in the community between types of debate (congress, LD, policy, PF, classic, others) and between national/local type teams. We are not supporting the people we need to be supporting. We don’t even know each other.

We need to do better.