March 7: Random Brain Droppings

/ Robyn Madson
  1. I have “Don’t Worry Baby” by The Beach Boys in my head.
  2. My dog is just 13 pounds but he takes up 3/4 of the bed.
  3. I’m listening to the police scanner, which seems like an old person thing to do.
  4. I washed my bedding today and it feels so soft and new.
  5. I went to a strip mall massage place today that looked kind of sketchy but was pretty fun and relaxing.
  6. The guy who did my massage totally worked out my legs – I’ve never actually had someone massage my thighs that well.
  7. My antibiotics are making my stomach uncomfortable and nothing helps.
  8. The massage comment sounded kind of weird. It wasn’t weird. But I acknowledge that, in hindsight, it sounded weird.
  9. My mom and I went out for lunch at a Nepali restaurant and she liked the food. The massage was her idea.
  10. We had a good afternoon.
  11. I have read more this week than I have read in a really long time.
  12. I have brief panic attacks about work all the time.
  13. I don’t know if they are really panic attacks, but my gut gets all weird and I have trouble breathing because I’m worried.
  14. I think I have these panic attacks because I want to do good work. And because of imposter syndrome.
  15. Today I saw a screenshot of the Wikipedia page for “Underachiever” and it pissed me off because it named and blamed ADHD as a reason.
  16. Things like that make those of us with ADHD and other disabilities or mental health issues feel even less secure than we normally are. We already feel ashamed pretty much all the time. Shit like that doesn’t help.
  17. My dog is low-key snoring and it’s adorable.
  18. He’s still taking up the whole bed and I don’t know how that’s even possible.
  19. Writing down all the things that jump into my brain helps calm them down.
  20. I have “All The Things She Said” by t.A.T.u. in my brain now.
  21. I like that song better than The Beach Boys.
  22. I only have a few days of break left and a million things I wanted to do and they are definitely not all going to get done.
  23. I’m not good at prioritizing. At all.
  24. I forgot to brush my teeth before sitting down to write, so now I have to get back up.
  25. 25 things is pretty good, I guess. My brain is calmer. Off to brush my teeth and go to sleep.

Leave a comment