A long time ago in a school district far away, a teacher friend pointed out “February is the worst month.” It always has been a rough month – I suppose because of where it falls in the school year combined with the ongoing dreariness of the winter weather. Then there are the looming budget cuts.

For years, the annual cuts at Forest Lake were heartbreaking because we would gain new, good teachers only to have the uncertainty of the end of the year hit and slowly, they were cut or they left to find somewhere more stable or more well funded. I was never afraid of cuts after the first couple years, though, so while the sadness was palpable, the connections I had made with my students were relatively safe.

This year is different. I have the least seniority in English in the district (I think) and I have no clue what crazy things are happening. I don’t know about numbers, I don’t know about budgets, I don’t know anything. It’s really a rollercoaster:

School feels more tense than usual and I’m not sure if it’s just me and my perception, if something weird is going on, or if it’s just February and everything sucks.

Here’s the thing though: I made my peace with my choice to move and it was the right thing to do. I hope I get to stay and continue to build the relationships I’ve already started to build. I’d like another shot at teaching this Composition class – I’ve learned so much this time through!

But if I don’t, I’m still glad I got the opportunity. Things will be okay, probably, no matter what. I’m glad I took this risk. I feel appreciated for my talents and I am learning and growing.

I have had trouble sleeping the last couple nights, but I’m really tired tonight, so hopefully I will get a great night’s rest and tomorrow will be a good day.